Confession is not only good for the soul, it’s also the
foundation of revival. Honesty is a concept few would argue with, but it is
rarely lived by outside the elementary level. If I’m late for work because I
overslept it would be wrong of me to excuse myself by saying my car wouldn’t
start, few would argue with that, but what if I struggled with pornography.
Would I be better off acting like I had that all together? How about bitterness
or selfishness? Would it be right to pretend those problem areas of my life
didn’t exist and portray myself as perfect to those who know me? Liars. It
makes us liars.
Dishonesty portrays false confidence which is the very
essence of pride. Living like we don’t need God’s grace depreciates His grace
in front of the audience our life is supposed to be expressing grace to. We lie
to the world about how flawless our faith has made us and all we do is convey
to them that even WE don’t need God. We lie to the church about how far we have
progressed spiritually and all we do is trample the sincere and embarrass the
struggling souls right back into solitude and failure. We lie to our families
about our holiness and we lose them. The Bible said the effectual, fervent
prayer of a righteous man availeth much! Scripture promises that children who
are trained the way they should go won’t depart from it! God, in His word,
designates grace to the humble! By hiding and denying our flaws, by shifting
blame from our failures, by never taking responsibility for the inner sins, we
proclaim loudly to the world that the word of God is a lie! God knows me, do
you understand? He knows how wicked and deceitful my heart is, how wretched and
inconsistent my walk is and how imperfect I am; He just struggles convincing ME
of these facts most of the time. I’m
reminded of a recent discussion my wife and I had. When we met as teenagers she
was in the middle of the most rebellious crisis her heart had ever had.
Everybody around her saw how conservatively she dressed, how clean she lived,
how dedicated to her school work that she was and few knew what was happening
in her heart. She confessed just the other night that even though she wasn’t
involved in any vile, outward sin that her heart was as wicked as it possibly
could have been! Had she died before making peace with God about it do you
think He would have excused her heart problem since its desires were never
gratified? Or do you think He would have judged her heart?
I graduated with a guy named Thomas Zuniga. He was the shy,
quiet type and few got to know him. I spent a lot of time around him and ate
lunch with him almost every day but I still can’t say I ever really got to know
him. I noticed on Facebook years after we graduated where he had begun documenting
a personal struggle in his life through writing but I never paid it much
attention until the words “gay Christian” got tossed into a discussion he was a
part of. Of course, I’m not a fan of that title just like I’m not a fan of the
title “bitter Christian” or “selfish Christian”, it identifies you with sin
when God identifies us with deliverance. As I begun reading some of his blog posts
and even interviewing him privately I discovered a man who believed homosexuality
and all of its gratifications to be sinful and displeasing to Christ but a man
that was also honest about his struggle with those desires. He wants to have a
wife and kids one day and desires that God use his battle as a help to others
who are in the same position. My first thought was “man, he is brave to admit
that!” Why? Why would he have to be brave? Because there is a very real fear
that Christians would discard a person that was honest about such a struggle.
It’d be better if he just lied about it! Right?
Before you get too Pharisaical, dear proud Christian, I’d
like to remind you that MY pride struggle is just as much of an abomination
unto my Maker as Tom’s homosexuality struggle.
Tom’s battle is with desire. I, on the other hand, have followed through
with my God robbing pride on more occasions that I even care to have a count
on! Am I to cruise into church in my suit on Sunday and have the teens seated
around me believe that I am the epitome of the Christian life or by some
strange chance should I be honest? The first person I have to come clean with
is ME. “Having a form of godliness but denying the power thereof” is a quote
from scripture that nails us to the wall about our pretending. When concrete is liquid it will take the shape
of any form it is poured into. How long, though, does it hang out in that form
before it gets stuck looking like that forever? We fear change because we
perceive change to be compromise but confession is not compromise; false
religion is! We testify about the sins we committed before God saved us but we
have to build staircases to get up on top of our rugs because of how HIGH they
stand with all the CURRENT sin struggles we’ve stuffed under them! I’m a normal
man and I struggle with lust to the point that I have to make daily decisions
about it! I battle covetousness every time I see a foreign sports car! I envy
the wicked as King David did when I see their lives of pleasure laid next to my
life of warfare. I battle selfishness every time my baby wakes up in the middle
of the night and my instinct says send your wife in there! I surfed past a
wicked country song just last week and I finished listening to it and had to
get my spirit back right with God about it. I battle ME every day of my life
and you are in the same trench! We have two options and they are confession or
denial. Denial produces pride and if you are a proud, self accepting, sin
denier you may as well be a practicing sodomite in the eyes of almighty God
because both are abominations in His eyes and only pride would argue with that!
Who are you? Have you ever asked yourself that question? Who
are you? There is the mask you wear that scripture refers to as your “person”
and then there is who God sees. Revival is when what God sees and what you see
become one and the same; its where the healing starts, where the growth begins.
Are you ready to be honest?
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